I've Got the Resurrection in Me

Lord I know you might be angry but please Father hear me out
I pray that you would hold your wrath Father, please God don't shout
Lord I need to talk to you, I promise you that this time I won't cry
I come to you right now to ask you this one question...why?
Why Lord can't I get over this one sin that I've been struggling with for years
Lord this one sin has brought me too much grief, too many tears
And why Lord does it seem that I cannot stop this habit? God I'm so weak
But in your Word it says those that will inherit the earth will be meek
But I don't know Lord I'm lost I'm confused I'm consumed by this plague
My guesses for why I can't stop are so ignorant and so vague
I need help Lord, I need you to break me free
The Devil is blinding me Lord I need you to help me see
I can't walk in darkness and expect myself not to stumble
I come to you for three things make me wise and keep me humble
The third is to turn this weakness into a strength, please turn this around
Please Father order my steps, place my feet on solid ground
Because right now my feet are sinking in sinful quicksand
I'm neck deep stretching out looking for a helpful hand
And Lord I can see you on the edge reaching out trying to lend me help
But at this point the sand at my mouth you can't hear me scream or yelp
But I can hear you say "You believe in my son you've accepted Him into your heart,
you think that is it, but you're forgetting another part
My ears haven't sunk yet Lord, so I know I can still hear you
I look upon you speaking and Lord I still fear you
But I'm sinking Lord, I'm terrified, my anxiety has reached an all time height
My eyes aren't covered yet so I can see you speaking what a glorious sight
You keep talking to me in spite of my trial of pain and strife
You open your mouth and say "You must be like my son and sacrifice your life"
And I think to myself Lord you want me to kill myself you want to bring me death
I can see you shaking your head with a sigh and then you take a deep breath
And then you say "Do not kill yourself but sacrifice the life of your past,
When you accept my son the old life should be gone it shouldn't last,
My son came to this earth so that you might have life and that much more
You just don't know that I have many blessing for you waiting in store"
And then you reach down and instead of taking my hand to pull me out you place your fingers on my head
And then I have a vision of a mother holding the body of her grown son who is dead
The son's back has been brutally whipped, the flesh is completely torn you can almost see the bone
The mother weeps bitterly with her son's blood on her clothes, I can hear her groan
And behind them I see a cross with a plaque on top labeled that reads "Jesus of Nazareth King of the Jews"
I look at the sons body and notice some bruises with a mixture of colors, some reds and some blues
And then I see the son has enormous holes in his hands and his feet
Followed by a gaping hole in his side that trails blood, truly this wasn't discreet
And then slowly the son's face was revealed and what I saw was so bloody and gory
Who in the world would make this up? This is not a fictional story
I saw the son's head covered in thorns that resembled a crown
And from his scalp dripped deep red tears that sorely fell down
And when I saw this I thought to myself who could do such a thing to another person, another human being
And Lord this is your son Jesus, I know what I am seeing
I saw the torment that was inflicted upon the body of the son and tears from the mother would not cease
But the one thing that I cant forget is that the emotion that was left on his face was not anguish but peace
And then you pull back your hand from my head and the vision is gone and I'm still here in the sand sinking
My mind at the moment is paralyzed by the vision I don't know what I am thinking
At this moment my whole body is practically buried, my hand is the only thing out of the sand that sticks up
And then I say in my mind "Lord I sacrifice my old life and devote a new one unto you" and then my body picks up
You lift me out of the quicksand and place me before you
And before you say anything I drop on my knees and say Lord I adore you
You say "Just as my son was sacrificed and resurrected and accepted by some of this world and even you,
I accept your sacrifice of your life of old and resurrect you as new.
For you all each have your problems, your individual struggles, your own cross to bear
You've made mistakes, you've sinned, but I can see your heart, you care
Just as the third day of my sons death the stone was cast down and rolled away
I shall cast down your old life and make a new way
For in you I see a resurrection of truth, a resurrection of your spirit
You are a servant of mine because I spoke the Word and you chose to hear it
So get off your knees my servant there's no need to feel guilt or sorrow
You will wake up and you will be different you will be new tomorrow
And as I stood before you I saw your hand being stretched out toward me and on your hand was the word grace
And then at that moment my eyes closed and when they opened I was lying in bed with tears streaming down my face
And as I lied there in astonishment with the fact that answered my question why
I smile and laugh to myself and say "Lord I said I wasn't going to cry"
But I realize that what you did for me on that day was an astounding cost, an incredible price
And if you gave up your life for me than I should be able to do the same so I stretch out my arms and I sacrifice
And Lord I can feel your spirit in this place, the whole room, every section
My old life has past, it is dead an here comes the resurrection


-Andre Newman